My Orkut profile shout out says “ Is marriage so important in life?”. This question is lingering in my mind for a long time. I always felt that Marriage is just a licensed way of having sex. That may sound clichéd and errand. I will explain in it in a better way. How two people can live together without even knowing each other before, procreate after a ring is exchanged or a string is tied around the girl’s neck?

Is it not stupid? I dunno how arranged marriages work out in this country? I have a friend in Romania and she was asking about marriages in India. I was explaining her about the arranged marriages. She asked a very simple but shocking question.

“Don’t you guys have sex before marriage?”

I said “No”

“Then how would you know the sexual compatibility of both?”

I couldn’t answer the question and my thoughts ran in to the number of divorces and illegal relationships in India. And also it went to Revathi’s question in Mouna Raagam, when her mother asks her to go to Shanthi Muhurtham (First night or Marriage night). “Would you have asked me to go in to the room yesterday?” .

Marriage is a life of two people. By committing in to a serious relationship, we are getting in to a marriage bonding. It’s not the ring or the string which decides the marriage. It’s the two people, who have to decide whether to live together or part . But most of the marriages in this country are decided by money, business, family status, caste, religion and family egos.

My dad wants me to get married. And he asked my expectations. I gave a long, difficult list of my expectations on the girl from personal values to career aspirations, even simple things … It may seem odd but I did it because I don’t believe in the institution of arranged marriages. I always felt that I should find the girl myself beyond religion, caste, creed or even nation.

I don’t why my family is so desperate in getting me in to arranged marriage wedlock. Is it because my brother had a good love marriage? Or is it the typical parental ego which has creped in? I could not understand what matters to them on my choice of the girl. It’s me, who has to live my life with that person for ever. Nobody else can live my life. Then it is me, who has to choose the person whom I am going to live with.

So this blog post is an ultimatum. “People I am going to choose my girl. Whatever you are doing is just a waste of time.”

P.S:Do you guys wanna know what are my list of expectations, which i sent to my dad… I will tell you after i find the girl.

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Posted by Sylvian

Marketing Analyst by profession, a quizzer by passion, a blogger by choice, a poet by chance, a non-conformist by gene and a rebel by birth


  1. All what you’ve written are the opinion of mine too.
    I’m still so young, but, i feel exactly the same.


  2. Thanks Aravind for the Comment…
    If you feel the same, then beware, you will be termed as a misfit and misnomer, like me. I could not force myself to think what others think is right…


  3. Can't agree with you more! I am not sure if I saw a reflection of my thoughts here!!!
    Good luck with your bride-hunt.
    Always remember that true love will find you. And you do not have to go in search of it ever.


  4. Hop dis is de time to reveal de list of expectations, which u hav sent to ur dad…


  5. […] My thoughts on marriage have always been criticized by my family and peers (don’t see the comments, the arguments usually happen offline). Yesterday I watched “We the People” in NDTV on the topic “Happily Unmarried?” which had some wonderful view points on marriage and relationships. Although my fondness towards Barkha Dutt has deteriorated over the years especially after 26/11, I like “We the People” concept as it brings out some real thoughts from real people. […]


  6. What are your expectations sir?


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